Figuring Out What is Truly Important

why-holding-hands-feels-so-good * This posted was originally featured on The Student Affairs Collective.

My decision to move to Maine last year to continue being close to my partner was a simple one, but it has had major implications for our lives together. 

I've talked about my job search story before, so I won't go to much into that part of my journey. The choice to move up to my home state and be close to my partner was an intentional one on my part. I picked up and moved (after having also moved a short distance for graduate school just two years before) leaving behind a lot of things I enjoyed about being in the Mid-Atlantic region. Delaware was where I grew up and could envision my self settling down in the future. Nevertheless, I couldn't see myself being happy being far away from my partner (someone I see myself spending the rest of my life with). I wanted to be able to help her feel supported in a stressful time in her life as she began graduate school. It was also a nice chance to live in my home state for the first time (I've visited often but never lived here) and be closer to my extended family than I've ever been before.

My decision making during my own anxiety ridden job search felt easier when I gave serious thought to what I truly wanted and what was important to me. My relationship trumped all other things since even if everything else was going wrong, I'd have my partner to support me and spend time with. While there are times we both wish we were back in New Jersey, we're glad to be here in Maine together exploring a new area and meeting new people. We've been able to spend a lot quality time together and become closer than ever before. Our relationship would have been strained if we ended up hours apart and I'm very grateful to have the opportunity to support her and continued to strengthen our bond.


As we all move forward in our lives and careers, I encourage you all to give mindful consideration to what you really want. Family, region, significant others, functional area, or any other reasons are all valid as long as they're your own reasons, not someone else's or what you think you're "supposed" to be doing. Do what you want and do whatever is best for you. I did, and I would never have chosen differently.